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Tomboy Tarts October Prickly Picks

What news events catch the eye of the Tomboy Tirade crew this October? The co-hosts of Asia’s biggest and only all-female comedy chat podcast, Persis and Raven give their prickly picks for the month. Founded in 2013, Tomboy Tirade (pronounced Tomboy Tee-rahd, the way we like to say it) is a no-holds comedy chat podcast with a whole lot of geek and humour thrown into every episode.

PRICKLY PICK #1
California has laws set up to control cow farts and belching.

Yeah the headlines are funny but livestock in the surf state are contributing to the foul stench in the air. Methane accounts for 11 percent of total US climate pollution. And it comes from a bunch of different sources, including natural gas leaks, landfills, and yes, livestock.

In light of that, a few cows were recently arrested in the Sherman Oaks Valley for uncontrollable belching and farting. Bail has been set to a million bags of cotton seed and dried corn.

PRICKLY PICK #2
‘Very Drunk’ Jimmy Fallon Caught Dancing All Night At Punk Bar

Jimmy Fallon just can’t walk a straight line anymore, can he? The Tonight With Jimmy Fallon host has been plagued by endless drunken stupors and his party-boy ways haven’t slowed down, despite previous reports of substance abuse issues.

According to Page Six, the “very drunk” Tonight Show host danced the night away at punk bar Manitoba’s this week. “He was at the end of the bar playing ’90s music on his phone,” one onlooker told the publication. Wait – isn’t that what a normal stand up comedy show feels like on a Saturday night in LA? What’s the big deal?

PRICKLY PICK #3
Miley Quits Weed — Then Twerks Down the Aisle? WTF?

Weed fiend Miley Cyrus said, “I DON’T” to drugs — so she could say “I DO” to Liam Hemsworth in a super-secret wedding! RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned the “Wrecking Ball” singer, 23, and Hemsworth, 26,tied the knot at the Down Under home of his big brother, Thor star Chris — and her dad, Billy Ray Cyrus, officiated.

And while some brides like to diet before the big day, “shredding for the wedding,” “Miley quit weed for Liam,” said an insider. Meanwhile, other sources reveal that Liam has quit something too, to twerk down the aisle with Miley. His sanity.

Our best wishes to the married couple for their impending rehab, or divorce, whichever comes first. The countdown clock begins in three – two – one!

PRICKLY PICK #4
Selena Gomez Checks Into Rehab To Battle Depression, Emotional Issues and Her Bad Singing

Apparently, Selena Gomez has secretly checked into a top rehab on the East Coast of the USA in early September for the next 60 days in a last-ditch attempt to help her get a handle on an emotional and health crisis.

Wait, we thought it was because she realised that she couldn’t even stand her own singing. Were we wrong?

PRICKLY PICK #5
Daniel Radcliffe Wants To Play Spiderman, Yet Turns Up in the Wrong Outfit for the Auditions

Of course, Daniel Radcliffe wants to be Spider-Man. We all want to be Spider-Man. The wall-crawler is up there with Superman and Batman as one of the most globally popular superheroes ever created. Daniel recently revealed to Loaded, even if the Spider-Man role was currently available, one might not want a face like Daniel Radcliffe’s underneath the mask.

Sources at Marvel confirm that is indeed true because during the auditions, Daniel showed up in a Gryffindor Quidditch outfit with a broom instead of the skin-tight Spidey costume they had specially mailed to him for the screen test. Mischief not managed?

PRICKLY PICK #6
Angelina Jolie splits up with Brad Pitt

Bye, Brangelina. Hello, Bradexit. Brangelina is heading for Splitsville, sending America into a period of national mourning that hasn’t been seen, since the swift downfall of Tom Hiddleston from next potential Bond to the new King of Tabloids. The great Hollywood love story has been shattered, leading Internet to declare that love is all, but dead. Sources claimed that Pitt’s weed smoking was the cause of the divorce. Who knows, his character Floyd in True Romance could be autobiographical after all.

PRICKLY PICK #7
Donald Trump Appeared in a Playboy Soft Porn Video

Donald Trump has become the first ever presidential candidate to release a public statement containing the words, “check out the sex tape”, putting all previous presidential speeches before this to PG-rated shame.

But he has popped the cork too soon during his slut-shaming of Alicia Machado. Instead, his own sex tape was uncovered, where Trump was seen popping champagne in a softcore porn video featuring twin Playboy models. We heard that the presidential candidate had offered to do go all the way but the director had decided that his hands were too small – who wants to watch that?

PRICKLY PICK #8
Elon Musk reveals his plan to colonise Mars and soon.

Elon Musk wants human beings to go to Mars – badly. He just doesn’t want to be the first person to go. Because uhm, there’s a very good chance of dying. Given SpaceX’s lacklustre safety record, we predict that the sequel Final Destination: Mars Edition would be the biggest blockbuster summer hit in 2024.

In support of the Mars mission, every Masterchef challenge will now involve potatoes. “I am a celebrity…get me out of Mars” ex-contestant Matt Damon has been announced as the celebrity judge for the next season and he will reveal the 25 potato dishes that you have to eat before you die.

PRICKLY PICK #9
Taiwanese woman eats bun during a typhoon, becomes online sensation.

When you’re really hungry, not even the wrath of the gods can stop you. That’s why the Taiwanese women photographed eating a pork bun in the middle Typhoon Megi is doing life right. Why let a little thing like an impending meteorological doom stop you from chomping down delicious food? Priorities, people.

Taiwanese woman bun

“Sure you give me this bull shit typhoon, but here I am standing tall with my bun…”

PRICKLY PICK #10
South Korea plans to assassinate Kim Jong Un

That’s right, we should totally blast our assassination plans to the entire world. In case, your rivals aren’t already aware that you are planning a secret attack on their country leader. Maybe that explains why Samsung has now evolved into a defense company specialising in time appliance bomb devices. With exploding Note 7 and washing machines, who needs bombs and snipers these days? I never knew that owning a Samsung device can be such an explosive experience.